Mommy on vacation

caro — Thu, 14 May 2009 16:59:17 +0000

“I don’t miss him.”, Sasha looks at me with her honest, clever and deep brown eyes. Disarmingly honest. Then she slides from the floatie in the pool we sit on into the turquois water. I get rocked a little and jump in to join her. “I know what you mean”.
I am perfectly fine without Julia here. It’s my three night trip to Los Angeles without my daughter who’s taken care of by nanny, grandmother and husband at home. Yes, I call her every day to check in and say: “I love you! Have a great day, I see you soon, when mommy is back home.” But I don’t feel that urge to hold her at that moment and if I do, I know it comes with duties like building space ships with lego for an hour or playing make believe cooking soups for another hour. So I don’t dwell in my emotions of missing her and I say to Sasha: “I don’t miss her either.” Does that make me cold-hearted, cruel, or even – ohh – the “bad mommy”? It’s about quality, not quantity one says about parenting. No child is well served with a parent that’s there, but not there, if you know what I mean. When hours add up at home without a break playing endless games with your toddler you just zone out. What follows, is an agry scream from your little angel: “Ahhh!” Or in a better case, “Mommy, I need your attention.”, which my friend Hannah impressively taught her 4 year old to say when he feels he doesn’t get enough mommy time while she’s breastfeeding the new baby girl. It works, I witnessed it. The little boy was whimpering, Hannah says to him, “Honey, I need you to use your words. I need you to tell me, what you need.” And so he did: “I need your attention, mommy!” She cradled him shortly after she was done breastfeeding. Our little ones understand a lot, if you tell them. Also that mommy is coming back from a three night vacation soon. Motherhood is a full time life-long gig, so a little trip for yourself is well deserved. Missing the little one is just going to make you be there, but not be here, if you know what I mean.

mothergate » vacation – with or without baby

Mommy on vacation